Taking a little trip into the past, here's a joke from 1922's Jokes for All Occasion, published by Edward J. Clode. These jokes were designed for public speakers in a day when public speakers had no idea how to be funny. The jokes are very weak; many of them are offensively racist to today's reader. As such, these jokes are really bad and are fair game for today's post. Here's a pretty bland one:
A thriving baseball club is one of the features of a boy's organization connected with a prominent church. The team was recently challenged by a rival club. The pastor gave a special contribution of five dollars to the captain, with the direction that the money should be used to buy bats, balls, gloves, or anything else that might help to win the game. On the day of the game, the pastor was somewhat surprised to observe nothing new in the club's paraphernalia. He called the captain to him.
"I don't see any new bats, or ball, or gloves," he said.
"We haven't anything like that," the captain admitted.
"But I gave you five dollars to buy them," the pastor exclaimed.
"Well, you see," came the explanation, "you told us to spend it on bats, or ball, or gloves, or anything that we thought might help us to win the game, so we gave it to the umpire."
[insert rim shot here.]