Openers: The girl screamed once, only the once.
Even that, however, was a minor slip on his part. That might have been the end of everything, almost before it had begun. Neighbours inquisitive, the police called in to investigate. No, that would not do at all. Next time he would tie the gag a little tighter, just a little tighter, just that little bit more secure.
Afterwards, he went to the drawer and took from it a ball of string. He used a pair of sharp nail-scissors, the kind girls always seem to use, to snip off a length of string of about six inches, then he put the ball of string and the scissors back into the drawer. A car revved up outside, and he went to the window, upsetting a pile of books on the floor as he did so. the car, however, had vanished. He tied a not in the string, not any special kind of know, just a knot. There was an envelope lying ready on the sideboard.
-- Knots and Crosses by Ian Rankin (1987)
I recently streamed all four season of Rebus, both the John Hannah and the Ken Stott versions. The two actor appeared to playing very different characters but both portrayals were interesting. One of my failings ( and I have many, sadly) is that I have never read a book by Ian Rankin, one of the most celebrated crime writers of our time. To remedy that, I picked up Knots and Crosses, the first Rebus novel. It was the second novel published by Rankin and the first of 25 novels, 27 short stories, one novella, and a non-fiction book about the character
Knots and Crosses, written as a standalone novel, introduces Rebus as a Detective Sergeant in the Edinburgh police department. He is divorced with a pre-teen daughter. His late father had been a stage magician, as is his nearly-estranged brother. To get away from family life, Rebus joined the army, where he performed extremely well. He then transferred to the elite SAS, whose training included sadistic torture that broke him. He left the SAS and joined the police, but his experiences with the SAS followed him and adversely affected his life. Now he is bitter, disillusioned, and drinks too much. Rebus is apt to go his own way, even in the regimented police force.
There is a child serial killer at work in Edinburgh, one who strangles young girls without molesting them. At the same time Rebus has been receiving anonymous envelopes, each with a cryptic message and a string tied in a knot; later envelopes contain tiny wooden crosses held together with string. Rebus plays little attention to them. With virtually every other member of the police, Rebus is more focused on the child killer, whose victims appear to have absolutely no common link.
In the meantime, an ambitious journalist has tied Rebus's brother to drug running and also suspects Rebus of being involved with drugs and even of being the serial killer himself.
Rebus stumbles across the common link between the victims and it proves that the killer -- whoever he or she is -- has a personal vendetta against Rebus...and that the next victim will be Rebus's own daughter. Rebus may be too late to save his daughter -- she has been kidnapped. Can Rebus find the killer in time to save her? There are no guarantees in this dark book.
Knots and Crosses was followed by a second Rebus novel, Hide and Seek, four years later. Over time, Rebus becomes a Detective Inspector and refuses a promotion to Detective Chief Inspector. Eventually he retires, but continues consulting for the police. Through it all, Rebus remains a deeply flawed character, struggling to overcome past mistakes.
Sir Ian Rankin (b. 1960; named an OBE in 2002; knighted in 2022) has been awarded the CWa Dagger for Short Story (twice), the CWA Gold Dagger for Fiction, and the CWA Lifetime Achievement Award (the Cartier Diamond Dagger), as well as an Edgar Award for Best Novel (and also short-listed once), Denmark's Palle Rosenkrantz Prize, Finland's Whodunnit Prize, France's Grand Prix du Roman Noir and Grand Prix de Litterature Policier, Germany's Deutsche Kimi Prize, the Edinburgh Award. the ITV3 Crime Thriller Award for Author of the Year, Theakston's Old Peculiar Crime Novel of the Year Award, Specsavers National Book award for Outstanding Achievement, the RBA Prize for Crime Writing, the Chandler-Fulbright Award, as well as being elected to the prestigious Detection Club, the Royal Society of Edinburgh, and the Royal Society of Literature. He has been a UNESCO City of Literature Visiting Professor and has been elected a Hawthornden Fellow. He has received honorary doctorates from five Universities. He has released recordings, a graphic novel, and has written a libretto for an opera.
Incoming:
- "Philip Atlee" (James Atlee Phillips), The Paper Pistol Contract. The fourth of thirty-nine Joe Gall Secret Agent novels. "Meet Joe Gall...The Nullifier. He kills by special contract only. In the great, grim game of espionage, he is the master freelance counterspy, the cold deck artist, the enforcer, the ruthless take-out man who stops at nothing. His mission is to always win -- however he does it. If subtlety fails, he overturns the table and shouts Earthquake1 Joe Gall is in Tahiti, where the ancient rites of love are ever new, and where the French are planning an atomic test. The Contract is to sabotage the test -- and then to throw the blame on the Red Chinese. The Stakes: survival or annihilation." Phillips also published several novels under his own name and was the co-writer of the screenplay for the Robert Mitchum vehicle Thunder Road.
- Jay Bonasinger, Robert Kirkman's The Walking Dead: Search and Destroy. Television tie-in, an original novel based on the television series, and part of the Woodbury saga. "For many months, the plague has taken its toll on the living. Nerves are frayed. Resources are dwindling. And the dead still refuse to stay dead. But what Lilly Caul and her ragtag band of survivors discover one evening, returning home to Woodbury after a hard day of scavenging in the hinterlands, is the worst-case scenario: the town has been brutally and inexplicably attacked by unknown assailants, and all of the town's children have been kidnapped. Now Lily and her team are launched on a desperate rescue mission., which leads from the walker-infested rural wastelands and into the ruins of post=plague Atlanta. But that they find there, festering behind the walls of the derelict medical center, will not only change Lilly's life forever, but will very likely change the course of the plague itself. " See also Robert Kirkwood, below.
- "Max Brand" (Frederick Faust), Peter Blue. Collection of three western novellas: "Speedy's Mare" (Western Story Magazine, March 12, 1932, one of nine stories written about Speedy, clever young hero who could outwit even the deadliest of men without the use of a gun; "His Fight for a Pardon" (Western Story Magazine, June 27, 1925 as by "George Owen Baxter", features an outlaw from a poor background facing off against a gentleman outlaw born of privilege in an attempt to win a pardon; "Peter Blue, One-Man Gun" (Far West Illustrated, June 1927), in which Blue, an infamous gunman, becomes a redeemed outlaw.
- Italo Calvino, Invisible Cities. A novel or a work of meditation or a poem -- take your pick. "In a garden sit the ancient Kublai Khan and the young Marco Polo -- Tartar emperor and Venetian traveler. The mood is sunset. Prospero is holding up for the last time his magic wand; Kublai Khan has sensed the end of his empire, of his cities, of himself." also, Mr. Palomar. A novel (or, perhaps, a collection of short stories0, at times visual, at times anthropological, at times speculative. Both books translated by William Weaver.
- Orson Scott Card, Hidden Empire. Science fiction, sequel to Empire. "At the close of Empire, political scientist and government advisor Averell Torrent has maneuvered himself into the presidency of the United States in the aftermath of the devastating insurrection and civil war. but the truth is, he engineered that war, and becoming president was just the next step in his plan. Now that he has complete power, he has two goals: to expand the american imperial power around the world, and to control or silence the very few people who know that he was behind the assassination of the last elected president."
- Max Allan Collins & terry Beatty, Ms. Tree: Fallen Tree. The sixth and final volume of the Ms. Tree comic book adventures. The hell with Rico -- Mother of God. Is this the end of Ms. Tree?
- Glen Cook, She Is the Darkness. Fantasy, Book Two of Glimmering Stone, and the seventh book in the Black Company series. "The wind winds and howls with bitter breath. Lightning snarls and barks. Rage is an animate force upon the plain of glittering stone. Even shadows are afraid. At the heart of the plain stands a vast, grey stronghold, unknown, older than any written memory. From the heart of the fastness comes a great deep slow beat like that of a slumbering world-heart, cracking the olden silence. Death is eternity. Eternity is stone. Stone is silent. Stone cannot speak but stone remembers. so begins the next movement of the Glittering Stone...The tale again comes to us from the pen of Murgen, Annalist and Standard Bearer of the Black Company, whose developing powers of travel through space and time give him a perspective like no other. Led by the wily commander, Croaker, and the Lady, the Company is working for the Taglian government, but neither the Company nor the Taglians are everflowing with trust for each other. Arrayed against both is a similarly tenuous alliance of sorcerers, including the diabolical Soulcatcher, the psychotic Howler, and a four-year-old child who may be the most powerful of them all."
- Clive Cussler, with Paul Kemprecos, White Death. A Kurt Austin adventure from the NUMA Files. "A ruthless corporation is about to take control of the seas. For those who oppose them, there is White Death...This is a mission for Kurt Austin and the NUMA team." I have mentioned before that I am more of fan of Paul Kemprecos than of Clive Cussler.
- Ken Goddard, Balefire, Suspense thriller. "Huntington Beach, Southern California: A quiet haven of suburbia that becomes the scene of a series of brutal, unexplained killings that have stunned the local citizens -- and confused and angered the police -- because the killings are aimed at them. Detective Sergeant Walter Anderson: Commander of the homicide unit, experienced and unafraid, who will soon learn the true meaning of fear. Detective Rudy Hernandez: Dedicated homicide investigator and devoted father, who finds himself torn between protecting his family and defending his city. Brian Sheffield and Meiko Harikawa: supervisor of the Huntington Beach crime lab and his forensic-scientist lover, who discover the deadly secret behind the attacks and rush to stop the madness. But they'd better hurry. Because the murders aren't random, the killers aren't locals...and it's not just one little town that's at stake, but the security and peace of an entire nation."
- Jason Henderson, Highlander: The Element of Fire. Tie-in; the first of nine novels and one anthology by various authors based on the television series. "Centuries ago, the immortal pirate Khordas vowed to destroy MacLeod. Evil and insane Khordas delights in burning his victims inside their homes and ships, while he loots the pyres from which he alone can emerge. Nantucket, 1897. Now on an anniversary of blood, this undying monster springs an infernal trap around the Highlander. But the pirate doesn't want merely to kill MacLeod. Unless stopped, Khodas will sear to cinders everything -- and everyone -- the Highlander holds dear..." I liked the original movie, but the film franchise immediately jumped the shark. Then came the television series, which started off nicely, but soon devolved into parody. I wonder how the tie-in series fared.
- Robert Kirkman and Jay Bonansinga, The Walking Dead: Rise of the Governor. Tie-inb novel, the first in a series exploring the origins of fan-favorite characters from The Walking Dead universe. Here, we learn " how the Governor became the man he was, and what drove him to such extremes."
- "Murray Leinster" (Will F. Jenkins), Masters of Darkness. Collection of the four stories about detective Hines and super-villain Preston, who uses super-science to plunge the world into darkness. The stories -- "The Darkness on Fifth Avenue," "The City of the Blind," "The Storm That Had to Be Stopped," and "The Man who Put Out the Sun" -- first appeared in Argosy, 1929-1930, and helped launch Leinster's long career in science fiction.
- Christopher Morley, Parnassus on Wheels. The classic novel. "[T]he story of a marvelous man, small in stature, wiry as a cat, Olympic in personality. Roger Mifflin is part pixie, part sage, part noble savage, and all God's creature. With his traveling book wagon, named Parnassus, he moves through the New England countryside of 1915 on an itinerant mission of enlightenment. Mifflin's delight in books and authors (if not publishers) is infectious. With his singular philosophy and bright eyes, he comes to represent the heart and soul of the book world." The companion to this novel is The Haunted Bookshop. Morley was also the author of Thunder on the Left and Kitty Foyle.
- David Morrell, two novels, The Covenant of the Rose: "For two thousand years a hidden conflict has been waged. Now it is bursting into the open-- in a pitched battle over the very future of the planet...In the Amazon and in Africa, from oil spills to animal slaughter, the earth is being defiled, and two covert armies are locked in mortal conflict -- with a woman reporter caught in the middle. Drawn into the mysterious disappearance of a grey-eyed stranger and his horrific murder by fire, Tess Drake and a veteran New York City police officer follow the trail of blood from Manhattan to Washington to the ancient caverns of Europe. hunted by both sides, fighting for her life, Tess races toward the dark heart of a secret that will rock the world..." Also, The League of Night and Fog, the third novel in the Abrlard Sanction trilogy "They were once master assassins, Saul and Drew -- lethal weapons who dealt death with icy efficiency. Today they are silent warriors. Sick of the bloodshed. Penitent. But still potent. Now, for the first time, their paths will cross. Comrades in killing, they must join forces against a treacherous power from the past. This will be their most crucial assignment. It could also be their last."
- "J. D. Robb" (Nora Roberts), five more books in the eve Dallas "...In Death" series. Ceremony in Death, number 4 in the series: "Conducting a top-secret investigation into the death of a fellow police officer has Lieutenant Eve Dallas treading on dangerous ground. She must put professional ethics before personal loyalties. But when a dead body is placed outside of her home, Eve takes the warning personally. With her husband, Rourke, watching her every move. Eve is drawn into the most dangerous case of her career. Every step she takes makes her question her own beliefs of right and wrong -- and brings her closer to a confrontation with humanity's most seductive form of evil." Conspiracy in Death, number 8 in the series: "With the precision of a surgeon, a serial killer preys on the most vulnerable souls of the world's city streets. the first victim, a sidewalk sleeper, found dead in New York City. No bruises, no signs of struggle, Just laser-perfect fist-sized hole where his heart had once been. Detective Eve Dallas is assigned to investigate. But in the het of a cat-and-mouse game with the killer, Dallas's job is suddenly on the line. Now her hands are tied...between a struggle for justice -- and a fight for her career." Judgment in Death, number 11 in the series: In an uptown strip joint, a cop is found bludgeoned to death. The weapon's a baseball bat. The motive's a mystery. It's a case of serious overkill that pushes Eve Dallas straight into overdrive. Her investigation uncovers a private club that's more than a hot spot. Purgatory's a last chance for atonement where everyone is judged. Where your ultimate fate depends on your most intimate sins. And where one cop's hidden secrets are about to plunge innocent souls into vice-ridden damnation..." Kindred in Death, number 29 in the series: "A recently promoted captain of the NYPSD and his wife return early from their vacation. Not even their worst nightmares could have prepared them for the crime scene awaiting their arrival. Deena, their bright and vivacious sixteen-year-old daughter who had stayed behind, had been brutally murdered in her bedroom. Her body shows signs of trauma that horrifies even the toughest of cops, including Lieutenant Eve Dallas. As evidence starts to pile up, Dallas and her team believe they are about to arrest the perpetrator. unknown to them, someone has gone to great lengths to tease and taunt them by using a variety of identities. Overconfidence can leave to careless mistakes . For eve Dallas, one mistake is all she needs to serve justice." And, Brotherhood in Death, number 42 in the series: "Dennis Mira has had two unpleasant surprises. First, he learned that his cousin Edward was secretly meeting with a real estate agent about their late grandfather's magnificent SoHo brownstone, despite a promise they each had made to keep it in the family. then, when he arrived at the house to confront Edward, he got a blunt object to the back of the head. Luckily Dennis is married to charlotte Mira, the NYPSC's top profiler and a good friend of Lieutenant Eve Dallas. When the two women arrive on the scene, he explains that the last thing he saw before he was knocked out was Edward in a chair, bruised and bloody. And when he came to, his cousin was gone. With the room cleaned up and the security disks removed, there's nothing but a few traces left behind for forensics to analyze. A former lawyer, judge, and senator, Edward Mira has mingled with the elite and crossed paths with criminals, making enemies on a regular basis. Like so many politicians, he has also made some very good friends behind closed -- and locked -- doors. But a badge and a billionaire husband can get Eve access to places others can't go, and she intends to shine some light on the dirty deals and dark motives behind the disappearance of a powerful man, the family discord over a multimillion-dollar piece of real estate...and a new case that no one saw coming." Kevin Tipple has been lauding the praises of this series for some while, so I've begun to pick up the books when I come across them; I hope to start reading them this year. The sixtieth novel in the series, Blooded in Death, is due out this month.
- John Saul, Brainchild. Another horror/suspense novel by Saul in which very little good happens to a child. "Alex Lonsdale was one of the most popular kids in La Paloma, California. Intil the horrifying car accident. Until a brilliant doctor's medical miracle brought him back from the brink of death. Now, Alex seems the same. But in his eyes there is blankness. I his heart there is coldness. If his parents, his friends, his girlfriend, could see inside his brain, inside his dreams, they would be terrified. One hundred years ago in La Paloma, a terrible deed was done. A cry for vengeance pierced the night. The evil still lives. that vengeance still waits. Waits for Alex Lonsdale. Waits for the...BRAINCHILD." First rule of literary survival: Never be a kid in a John Saul novel.
- Thomas E. Sniegoski, the first five (of seven) novels in The Fallen YA fantasy series about a young man who is the son of a mortal and an angel. The Fallen 1: omnibus volume of the first two books in the series, The Fallen and Leviathan. "On his eighteenth birthday, Aaron begins to hear strange voices and is convinced he is going insane. But having moved from foster home to foster home, Aaron doesn't know whom he can trust. He wants to confide in the cute girl in class, but fears she'll confirm he's crazy. Then a mysterious man begins following Aaron. He knows about Aaron's troubled past and his new powers. And he has a message for Aaron: As the son of a mortal and an angel, Aaron has been chosen to redeem the Fallen. Aaron tries to dismiss the news and resist his supernatural abilities. But he must accept his newfound heritage -- and quickly. For the dark powers are gaining strength, and are hell-bent on destroying him. The Fallen 2: omnibus volume of the third and fourth books in the series, Aerie and Reckoning. "Aaron's senior year has been anything but typical. Half angel and half human, he has been charged to reunite the Fallen with Heaven. But the leader of the Dark Powers is determined to destroy Aaron -- and all hope of angelic reconciliation. Struggling to harness the incredible force within him, Aaron trains for the ultimate battle. With the Dark Powers gaining in strength, their clash may come sooner than he expects. and everyone who's ever mattered to Aaron is now in grave danger. Aaron must protect the girl he loves and rescue the only family he's ever known. Because if he can't save them from the dark Powers, how can he hope to save the Fallen?" The Fallen 3: standalone volume of the fifth book in the series, End of Days, packaged to conform with the earlier two volumes. "The war between Heaven and Hell rages on. Aaron, half angel and half human, commands the Fallen in their quest to protect humanity. But evil forces gain strength at every turn. And lurking somewhere in the shadows is Archangel Gabriel's instrument with the power to call down the End of Days. Aaron draws confidence from the girl he loves as he struggles to make peace as Lucifer's son." -- [Whoa Didn't expect that revelation!] -- "These are desperate times, and Aaron knows the Fallen will needs to forge new, unlikely alliances to survive. With the fate of the world hanging in the balance, Aaron will stop at nothing to defend civilization -- and the girl who holds his heart. Even if it means facing Hell's darkest demons." Sniegoski has written a number of fantasy novels, comic books, and comic-related works; one of his most popular series deals with another angel, Remy Chandler, who gave up Heaven to live on Earth and is now a private investigator.
Cream Cheese Brownies: So the Super Bowl is Over and you are either very happy and hungover, or very sad and hungover, or, perhaps, somewhere in between. Like many, you are wondering what to do with the rest of your life until football season stats up once again. Well, I can't help you over the long Run, but I can give you an idea on how to occupy some of your time today...because today is....[drum roll, please],,,NATIONAL CREAM CHEESE BROWNIE DAY!
So, let's get cracking, eh?
https://www.southernliving.com/recipes/cream-cheese-brownies
And...er...uh...: There's also another holiday today and I urge you not to conflate the two. With this holiday, you should definitely stay out of the kitchen:
https://www.daysoftheyear.com/days/national-poop-day/
The Sweet Science: In the news this week is the death of Irish boxer John Cooney. 28. after being injured in a title match a week before. Cooney was defending his Celtic superfeatherweight title against Welshman Nathan Howells in a February 1 match in Belfast. The fight was stopped in the ninth round. Cooney was assessed by an onsite medical team, then taken out in a stretcher to the Royal Victoria Hospital, where it was determined he had suffered an intracranial hemorrhage and was operated upon to relieve pressure on the brain. He remained in intensive care, dying on February 8. Cooney had won his title from Liam Gaynor in November of 2023 but a hand injury prevented him from boxing again until last October, when he defeated Tampela Maharrudi.
Cooney is just the latest in a long line of men who have died from injuries suffered in a bout. One estimate has over 500 deaths attributed to the sweet science sine the establishment of the Marquis of Queensbury rules. Because of various boxing leagues and federations and the methods used to record events it is difficult to get an accurate count. Then, too, there have been uncounted unrecorded later deaths related to injuries sustained in the ring.
In was ninety-two years ago on this day that 24-year-old Ernie Schaff was fatally injured in a match against Primo Carnera (who was lass than five months away from becoming the World Heavyweight Boxing champion). Schaff, who had an official record of 55-13-2, with 1 no contest and 4 no decisions (reports indicate that Schaaf had actually won 3 of those no-decision bouts); of his 75 total fights, 23 of his 58 wins were by KO, and he came into the February 19 match following a TKO win the previous month (the month before that, he claimed the New England Heavyweight title with KO win). But, in his best shape, Schaaf weight 200-210 pounds; Carnera weighed 250 pounds; of his 88 professional wins, 72 were by knockout; he won more fights by knockout than any other heavyweight champion.
Schaff suffered a knockout loss in round 13. He fell into a coma and was rushed to the hospital to undergo emergency surgery. He died on February 14. An autopsy revealed that Schaff had meningitis, a swelling of the brain, and was recovering from a severe case of influenza when he entered the ring against Carnera.
(Carnera, by the way, eventually lost his heavyweight championship to Max Baer, who, coincidently, had killed a boxer in a August 25, 1930 match -- 26-year-old Frankie Campbell died just hours after the match -- it was revealed that Campbell's brain had been knocked loose from the connective tissue in his head. Carnera was also a professional wrestler who had a 143-2-1 record after losing to world heavyweight champion Lou Thesz in May 1948. Carnera also had an acting career -- you might remember him as one of the tug-of-war-pulling strongmen in Mighty Joe Young. Carnera was also mob-linked and a number of matches have been deemed suspicious by those who have studied the sport.)
I know that boxing entails athleticism, stamina, speed, strength, coordination, and endurance. I understand that there is more to the sport than meets the casual eye. But to me it remains a blood sport, pure and simple. I know that many others will disagree with me, citing that every major sports -- even baseball -- has had its fatalities. But all I can see is a port where the sole purpose is to beat an opponent senseless.
Boxing will continue. Fans will cheer. More people will die or become permanently injured. The beat -- and the beatings -- go on.
Hearts and Flowers: 1930's Hearts and Flower, featuring Dolly Daisy, has been described as the creepiest sop-motion animated cartoon ever. The Internet Archive description of the cartoon calls it a "charming and heart-warming film that is sure to please audiences of all ages....a simple but effective tale of love and adventure." I believe whoever wrote that was on some serious drugs and had never watched the piece, giving plot descriptions that just are not there. There is a lot to unpack here behind the scenes, starting with voyeurism and going to a moon that likes to fondle a young girl's bottom., with a little bit of racism along the way. Creepy is a good word for it. See for yourself.
https://archive.org/details/dolly-dasiy-in-hearts-and-flowers-7680x-4320-prob-3-1/DOLLY+DASIY+IN+HEARTS+AND+FLOWERS.mov
Sir John Sucking: A unfortunate name perhaps, Suckling (1609-1641) was an English poet of "careless gaiety and wit." His father was Secretary of State under James 1; his uncle the Earl of Middlesex. His lose friends included Ben Jonson, Thomas Carew, and Richard Lovelace. A man of many talent, Suckling's poetry was brought to the attention of Charles I, and he later assisted Charles in the First Scottish War. He was deemed the most skillful card player, as well as the best bowler, in England. He invented the game of cribbage. It is unclear how he died but many believe he ingested poison either intentionally or unintentionally, and there has been a persistent rumor of a servant with a razor blade in his shoe.
Suckling is considered a Cavalier Poet. Some of his works are dismissive of women ("There never yet was woman made,/Nor shall, but to be curst;/And O. that I, fond I, should first,/Of any lover,/this truth at my own charge to other fools discover."). His most well-known poem is "A Ballad upon a Wedding":
I tell thee, Dick, where I have been,
Where I the rarest things have seen,
O, things without compare!
Such sights again cannot be found
In any place on English ground,
Be it at wake or fair.
At Charing Cross, hard by the way
Where we. thou know'st, do sell out hay,
There is a house with stairs,
And there I did see coming down
Such folks as are not in our town,
Forty, at least, in pairs.
Amongst the rest, one pest'lent fine
(His beard no bigger, though, than thine)
Walked on before the rest
Our landlord looks like nothing to him,
The King (God bless him!) 'twould undo him,
Should he go still so dressed.
At course-a-park, without all doubt,
He should have first been taken out
By all the maids i' th' town:
Though lusty Roger there had been,
Or little George upon the Green,
Or Vincent of the Crown.
But wot you what? the youth was going
To make an end of all his wooing,
The Parson for him stayed.
Yet, by his leave, for all his hast,
He did not so much wish all past,
Perchance, as did the maid.
The Maid (and thereby hangs a tale),
For such a maid no Whitsun-ale
Could ever yet produce.
No grape that's kindly ripe could be
So round, so plump, so soft, as she,
Nor half so full of juice!
Her finger was so small the ring
Would not stay on, which they did bring;
It was too wide a peck:
And truth to say (for out it must),
It looked like a great collar (just)
About out young colt's neck.
Her feet beneath her petticoat,
Like little mice, stole in and out,
As if they feared the light.
But oh! she dances such a way.
No sun upon an Easter Day
Is half so fine a sight!
He would have kissed her once or twice,
But she would not, she was so nice,
She would not do 't in sight.
And then she looked as who should say
"I will do what I list today
And you shall do 't at night."
Her cheeks so rare a white was on
No daisy makes comparison,
(Who seeks them is undone),
For streaks of red were mingled there,
Such as are on a Catherine pear,
(The side that's next the sun).
Her lips were red, and one was thin
compared to that was next her chin, --
(Some bee had stung it newly);
But, Dick, her eyes so guard her face,
I durst no more upon them gaze
Than on the sun in July.
Her mouth so small, when she does speak
Thou'dst swear her teeth her words did break,
That they might passage get.
But she so handled still the matter,
They came as good as ours, or better,
And are not spent a whit.
If wishing could be any sin,
The Parson himself had guilty been,
(She looked that day so purely),
And, did our youth so oft the feat
At night, as some did in conceit,
It would have spoiled him surely.
Just in the nick, the cook knocked thrice,
And all the waiters in a trice
His summons did obey.
Each servingman, with dish in hand,
Marched boldly up, like our trained band,
Presented, and away.
When all the meat was on the table,
What man of knife or teeth was able
To stay to be entreated?
And this the very reason was,
Before the parson could say grace,
The company was seated.
The business of the kitchen's great,
For it is fit that man should eat,
Nor was it there denied.
Passion o' me, how I run on!
There's that that would be thought upon,
I trow, beside the bride.
Now hats fly off, and youths carouse,
Healths first go round, and the the house
The bride's came thick and thick;
And when 'twas named another's health,
Perhaps he made it hers by stealth,
And who could help it, Dick?
O' th' sudden, up they rise and dance;
Then sit again and sigh and glance;
Then dance again and kiss.
Thus several ways the time did pass,
Whilst every woman wished her place,
And every man wished his!
By this time all were stolen inside
To counsel and undress the bride,
But that he must not know;
And yet 'twas thought he guessed her mind,
And did not mean to stay behind
Above an hour or so.
When in he came, Dick, there she lay
like new-fallen snow melting away,
('Twas time, I trow, to part)
Kisses were now the only stay,
Which soon she gave, as one would say,
"God-be-with-ye, with all my heart."
But, just as Heavens would have, to cross it,
In came the bridesmaids with the possit:
The bridegroom ate in spite.
For, had he left the women to 't,
It would have cost tow hours to do 't,
Which were too much that night.
At length the candle's out, and now
All that they had not done they do;
What that is, who can tell?
I believe it was no more
Than thou and I have done before
With Bridget and with Nell.
Dad Joke: The person who handled customer transactions at the Chocolate Bank quit his jub. He was replaced with a Nutella.
Ku Klux Klan: The Invisible Empire: A CBS Reports television documentary from 1965.
https://archive.org/details/kukluxklantheinvisibleempire_201505
Some Music: Among the many musical greats born on this date are:
- Adelina Patti (1843-1919), Italian opera singer, considered to be one of the most famous sopranos in history. Here's a restored copy of Patti singing "Casta Diva" from Bellini's Norma: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=r0_D65bedTc
- Jimmy Durante (1893-1980), actor, comedian, singer, and one of my wife's favorites (because he reminded her of her grandfather). One of his signature songs was "Inka Dinka Doo," and here's an absolutely joyous rendition: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=oV7XIw-eNUg
- Bertolt Brecht (1898-1956), German playwright and poet; his collaborations with Kurt Weill and others included The Threepenny Opera, which included this classic song, sung by Lotte Lenya: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=aPG9GcykPIY Cleaned up somewhat, it became a hit for Bobby Darin: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=557lFG-qq5g
- Chick Webb (1905-1939), American jazz and swing music drummer and band leader. Here's "Stompin' at the Savoy": https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=zgX5_waK--w
- Jean Coulthard (1908-2000), prominent 2oth century Canadian composer. Here's her "Canadian Mosaics/Introduction and Three Folk songs": https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=I3YkP4WGoqA
- Larry Adler (1914-2001), American harmonica player and composer; during his later career, he collaborated with Elton John, Sting, and Kate Bush. Here he is with Yitzak Perlman, performing Gershwin's "Summertime": https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mrdauSqH_EI
- Leontyne Price (b. 1927), American spinto soprano. Here's her absolutely glorious take on "Summertime": https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b7crcoAkVg0
- Jerry Goldsmith (1929-2004), celebrated American film and television composer. I was tempted to post his theme music for The Man from U.N.C.L.E, because I'm such a fan of that cheesy television show, but am opting instead to post his Academy Award-winning "Ave Satani" from the 1976 film The Omen: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hN14vgOZPmU
- Faramarz Payvar (1933-2009), Iranian composer and santur (or santour) player, who was playing the santur before it was considered cool. In large part because of Payvar, the santur is now considered an important solo instrument in Persian classical music. Here's the "Zarb Solo" from Payvar and ensemble: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=3Q89MYFjPog
- Theodore Antoniou (1935-2018), Greek composer and conductor. Here's his powerful and dramatic "Symphony No. 1" with the Symphony Orchestra of Belgarian Radio: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=qljqm4F5QOs
- Barbara Maier Gusten (1935-2022), beloved Broadway vocal coach whose students included Deborah Harry, Taylor Mac, Justin Vivian Bond, Diamanda Galas, and Kathleen Hanna. she was killed at age 87 when she was pushed to the ground by a woman outside her apartment, and died five days later. A week after her death, a 26-year-old woman turned herself in; the woman was eventually charged with manslaughter (although prosecutors had considered upgrading the charge to murder) and was sentenced to eight years in prison; a judge then extended the sentence by six months, saying he was not convinced the woman had taken responsibility for her actions. I don't have a recording of her singing, but here's an interview with her, introducing two of her students: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=QKkMwOnv7Ho
- Roberta Flack (b. 1937), a legend. Here's "The First Time I Ever Saw Your Face": https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=d8_fLu2yrP4
- Kenny Rankin (1940-2009), American folk-rock singer/songwriter. Here's "Peaceful": https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=av21FvTeScE
- Peter Allen (1944-1992), flamboyant Australian singer/songwriter and entertainer (and Liza Minelli's first husband). Here's "Arthur's Theme" (written with Burt Bacharach, Carole Bayer Sager, and Christopher Cross), performed with Christopher Cross: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eYpCxRVEwME
- Nigel Olssen (b. 1949), session musician and lifelong member of the Elton John Band. Here's "a Little Bit of Soap": https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DjIJZhF-Bu0
- Cliff Burton (1962-1986), Metallica bassist from 1982 until his death. Here's Metallica's "Orion," in which Burton's bass is really, really loud: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5HeV6uN5f5o
- Lorena Rojas (1971-2015), Mexican telenovela actress and singer. She died six days after her 44th birthday from breast cancer which had metastasized throughout her body. (**sigh**) Here's "Sin Ti No Si": https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=eI8hQAqp-dY
- Ivri Lider (b. 1974), Openly gay Israeli pop singer. Here's "Song to a Siren": https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5iVerkWDXqM
- Don Omar (b. 1978), Puerto Rican rapper, known as the "King of Reggaeton." Here's "Pobre Diabla": https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=5iVerkWDXqM
- Vic Fuentes (b. 1983), co-founder and lead vocalist of Pierce the Veil. Here he is featured on "Somebody That I Used to Know" from Mayday Parade: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=DZRuPe97GzY
- Choi Soo-Young (b. 1990), South Korean singer, member of the girl group Girls' Generation, and actress. Here's "Winter Breath": https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=h1v-n0r1d9U
- Haruka Nakagawa (b. 1992), Japanese media personality and former member of Japanese idol groups AKB48 and Watarirouka Hashinritai and the Indonesian group JKT48. Here she is with JKT48 and "Winter Story": https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=XhLL2-04WA8
- Son Na-eum (b. 1994), South Korean actress and singer, a member of popular girl group Apink until 2022. As a popular idol, the products that she advertised began to sell out in record time, giving her the nickname "Sold-Out Girl." Here's a video covering come of her highlights with Apink: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=FTA_ofXNV7w
- And we close with another South Korean singer/birthday girl -- Kang Seul-gi (b. 1994), a member of the South Korean girl group Red Velvet and the supergroup Got the Beat. Here she is with red Velvet, performing "Anywhere But Home": https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=u2mFlOenmss
Best birthday wishes to this broad spectrum of musical talent.
I Can't Even...: No Florida Man section this time around, because I can't even...
Casey DeSantis, the wife of current governor Ron DeSantis is considering running for her husband's term-limited seat in 2026. Among many possible Republican contenders for the position, she seems the best-poised to run for the position, with some 38% of Republicans thinking it is a good idea -- admittedly a very low bar: 10% of Republicans want Matt Gaetz to run for the position. Gaetz, meanwhile, is smugly toying about running, saying he is a "'Florida Man, after all." He certainly is, and I can't even...
Today's Poem:
The Timeless Love
There once were lovers, aged and wise,
Who saw the world through joyful eyes'
"Though our hair turns to gray.
Our love will not sway.
It's forever young," they surmise.
-- anon.
And a Happy Valentine's Day!