Just read on this morning's SF SITE post that the Periodic Table of Elements is being changed; specifically, the atomic weights of ten elements are being altered. Let me announce clearly that any weight gain that I have had must be the direct result of some of those elements in my body and is no fault of my own! Alas and alack, though, if any of those ten elements had a drop in atomic weight, it it obvious that those elements are not present in my body. Just wanted to get that clarified.
Okay, you can go back to your morning coffee and daily routines now.