Wednesday, April 5, 2017

BAD JOKE WEDNESDAY

(I've been going through some back issues of The Comedy Bulletin, an Irish monthy newsletter from Dermot Crossley that published hundreds of jokes -- most of them unfunny or dated or cliched.  Here are the first ten from the June 1988 edition.)

- My uncle will do anything to improve his golf score.  He even considered a 'sex change' just so he could use the ladies tees.

- We all worship in our own way.  Mine is saying, 'Oh, God' every time a girl with a great body walks down the beach.

- I did ten deep knee bends today. I hate it when the chemist puts the condoms on the bottom shelf.

- Maybe I did have a little to [sic] much to drink last night -- but I didn't hear any complaints from that lamp post I asked to dance.

- I really shouldn't drink -- it makes my dog jealous when I'm down on all fours and he sees people pet me.

- My hangover is so bad it feels like haemorrhoids from the neck up.

- I don't want to say how much wine (      ) drank last night -- but he did qualify as a Catholic mass.

- Every summer its [sic] the same thing.  My neighbour starts to complain.  Just because my toilet overflows into his swimming pool.

- Times have changed.  My kids are scared to death of the neighbourhood bully, and I keeping telling them, 'You have just got to stand up to her.'

-  Eat, drink and be merry -- for tomorrow you'll have your head in the toilet.

(Sometimes I don't miss the good old days.)

1 comment:

  1. Terrible stuff. Could the '80s really have been that bad?

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