Thursday, December 27, 2012

LAZY DAZE

December 27th is meant to be a lazy day.  The stress of Christmas is behind us.  Boxing Day is behind us, as is the confusion of trying to figure out what the hell Boxing Day is.  (Come on, admit it:  how many of you went up to a stranger yesterday and cold-conked him, figuring that was what you were supposed to do?)  The stress of Christmas returns can be put off for a day.  And the massive infusion of tryptophan from the past few days is beginning to have an effect.  Yep, today is meant to be a lazy day.

In keeping with this spirit, today also happens to be Make a Cut-Out Snowflake Day.  (It's amazing the things you learn on the internet.)  Take a piece of paper.  Fold it in half.  Fold that half in half.  Repeat a few times.  (I once read that, no matter how large a piece of paper, it cannot be folded in half more than eleven times.  Is this true or an urban myth?  Who knows?  Who cares?  It's a lazy day -- certainly no time for such a complicated experiment.  Digression over; back to your cut-out snowflake.)  Take a pair of scissors (those little rounded-end ones they give kindergarteners will do nicely, thank you).  Do not run with the scissors.  Instead, start cutting little holes and wedges in your paper.  Unfold the paper and -- voila! -- a cut-out snowflake.  You can delay deciding what to do with this artistic masterpiece until some other day.  Also don't bother to pick up all  the little bits of paper detritus from the floor.  (If anyone asks, just say that the dog has this skin condition...)  This is your lazy day.  Celebrate by being lazy.

Since no two snowflakes are said to be alike (another urban myth, I fear, but good for our purposes), tout the fact that your artistic masterpiece is sui generis and reflects well on your intellect and creativity.  While doing that, you can send the kids into the kitchen to get you a beer or, perhaps, a piece of pie.

You've done enough for one day.  Relax.  Enjoy yourself.  It's a lazy day.

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